Good News?

The email message was titled Good News. Really?  Given this roller coaster world we have been living in for the past I don't know how many years - I don't actually know if it is or isn't. The slide Cheyanne was in (that I last posted about in March) continued, and last month the residential facility where she had been making some decent progress decided they can no longer keep her safe. That isn't untrue. Her last suicide attempt was a major one involving rope, a closet bar and even an accompanying letter.  And there was yet another run- away attempt including a stolen and then broken bottle of wine and a joy ride in the car of an unknown driver - but it is still disheartening. I don't know why I had let my hopes rise again, but of course I did. And now... now she sits at the Retreat for the third time in 2 years waiting for her ticket to the next stop on this incredibly difficult journey. The hardest part is, she doesn't qualify for many of the offered locales. She is either too acute,  or not acute enough for any available treatment facility in New England (or her insurance won't cover it).  And so, unbelievably right now we are looking at a choice of either Florida, Georgia or Tennessee!! My heart hurts to think about it. Yes, she has been away from home for more than two years now, but she has always been close enough that I knew I could get to her with a relatively quick 4-5 hour drive - never fun, but do-able. To realize that she now needs to be thousands of miles away and relatively inaccessible is really hard to swallow. I can actually feel the fingers of depression pulling me down again! I really did want her to get a place where she could be closer to home, come visit more regularly and really be part of her family again - not send her farther away for fewer visits and no real chance of more regular connections. And so the email.  Good News! Cheyann has been accepted at the ________ facility in Savannah Georgia. Is it good news? Do we punch that ticket??